relationships.

Dr. Greg Mitchell from the Vancouver church gave the sermon this weekend. Talk about convicting! Here are some important points that especially hit home for me:

"Love has nothing to do with perfection." I forget this sometimes.

"It is a huge statement of love to do something imperfectly for someone else." This is SO hard!

"The opposite of love is not hate. The opposite of love is selfishness." Eeek.

"Your greatest enemy is your own selfishness." Well, shoot.

"When things get complicated, it is because you are hiding your selfishness." Damn.

I have been thinking about these things all week, especially the perfection stuff. I am realizing that I have ridiculous standards, both for myself and for others, that no one can live up to. I think that this must greatly hinder me from loving people for who they really are.

I felt most convicted when Dr. Greg was describing how we look for a potential spouse. He described how most of us have our checklists of characteristics and personality traits that we look for, expecting to find the person who is most perfect, assuming that the closer to "perfection" they are, the better our relationship will be.

My heart sunk a little after hearing that. That describes ME. Although I haven't thought about it in this explicit way, I think that the basic ideas underly my thought process. My thinking has been selfish and wrong. And I haven't been giving people the love they deserve, because they don't live up to my standards. And for that, I am very sorry.

Dr. Greg said that it is the sharing of forgiveness and acceptance that makes love sweet. Well, I think that sounds pretty good.