hello again.

i quit the blog for a while. not intentionally, i suppose. i just never felt the need or the urge to say anything worth reading. maybe it's that i fear getting all preachy and thinking that i actually have something worth saying. i don't know. here i am.

life right now is good. i am learning a lot.

it's funny how god answers prayer. for a long time i have prayed that i would be able to trust god, that he would be my hope and my confidence, and that i would be free from worry regarding my future (see jeremiah 17:7-8). i guess i didn't realize that god wouldn't just drop those things in my lap, but that he would put me in situations that would allow me to choose him and put my trust in him, thereby allowing him to become my hope and confidence and set me free.

it's been a lot more difficult and rewarding than i expected. it is incredibly painful to be broken down but at the same time it's so freeing to know that i don't carry the burden of trying to prove myself through my actions or of trying to change myself.

i am beginning to understand that when god points out an issue in our lives it's not because he wants us to change it, but rather he wants us to submit our control of our own lives (our hearts, our own wills) to his authority, and in doing so we position ourselves to receive god's love and healing.

the blessings are too numerous to count.